To Colour, Or Not To Colour

“But I never asked you to go for root touch ups.”

Instantly I realized it was time for me to look inside. When philosophy starts making more sense after 52 years on this planet Earth, then it has to be the COVID-19 era. Actually, my husband felt bad for me as I was unable to visit a salon.

I had been so fond of flaunting my hair – my shades of burgundies and browns that I had forgotten the original colour – GREY, which was gradually catching up. People say you don’t know what you‘ve got until it’s gone. Three years back, my black hair realized the importance of melanin. In other words, my hair follicles were losing pigment cells. In other words, grey hair. In other words, anxiety. I decided to hand over my anxiety to the salon boys. They took charge of my hair. From global colour to hair washes every fourth day, they did them all with smiles and gratitude.

My husband and I in a salon.

Fighting Alopecia Areata

It was not my first time dealing with a hairy problem (or actually, a not-so-hairy problem!). When I was 45, my fingers felt a barren patch on my scalp close to my left ear. Thankfully Google enlightened me that it was Alopecia Areata. If you really love your Google searches then let me tell you one thing you all probably already know, Google not only has the power to provide you with information but it also has the power to freak you out. I was overloaded with information. And my brain started guiding me. That it could develop into either 1) totalis’ or 2) ‘universalis’. If it’s totalis, then only my scalp hair is gone but if it’s universalis – then my entire body hair is gone! On a lighter note, if it was the latter, I might have been slightly relieved (#ByeByeWaxing). But totalis would have happened in either case.

To that, my lovey-dovey husband came to rescue. He said, “Don’t worry! Both of us will always have ‘shaven-head look’.”

Those magical and comforting words helped me and my barren patch started to grow hair again. Not only did it help me, it also made some of my lovey-dovey husband’s hair come back (well, only a little bit #malebalding). Hardly five years had passed since my narrow escape from Alopecia Areata, and my hair stylist advised me to include root touch ups (remember melanin?).

Fighting Grey Hair

It had been three years now and I was marching on with my salon boys. They were always there – any metro, any city. With that confidence, I met a friend in a cocktail in January 2020. She was in awe of a lady with grey hair, “Wow she is ageing so gracefully.” I laughed, “Give me just 2-3 months and I will also age gracefully”.

God heard me and obliged with draconian lockdowns. Salons were out of bound and so were the Urban Claps. During lockdown, I started washing my hair again. I remember quite vividly that Sunday when India clapped and cheered for me to be self-reliant (#AtmaNirbharBharat #AtmaNirbharMe).

After PM Modi’s Diya Jalao Campaign, one thing became clear – even if lockdowns start easing, salons will not open again any time soon. By then, it was time for my root touch up. I desperately needed to visit a salon.

Just to hide my frustration and weakness I told my husband, “I go to salon because of you!” To which he was horrified, “But I never asked you to go for root touch ups”.

At once, I realized whatever he said was true! I have a husband who never bothered to colour his grey hair. Never bothered for mine as well. He just loved to see me pamper myself in salons. I had forgotten that I was doing it for myself. After all compliments on social media and parties were quite luring and enticing:

“Oh my, you look so young!”

“Didn’t realise you have grown up kids!”

“You and your daughter look like sisters!”

“You look so much younger than your husband!” and so on..

This time I decided not to get tempted and become self-reliant to colour my hair. Centimeters to inches, my grey started showing up. Few friends and family felt bad for me, few love me the way I am but most didn’t really care.

Most importantly, I feel good about myself. Salons have opened up, the Urban Company app is also there. But I am no longer desperate to go for my colours. I have left my hair the way they are. I flaunt my grey hair. I will surely join my salons back. But at least there’s one thing I know for sure.

I will not colour my hair.

Published by mudsmit

An Educator with experience of teaching in various Army and Public Schools. A Tree-Hugger & A New Naive Blogger

54 thoughts on “To Colour, Or Not To Colour

  1. An interesting read.Loved the narration…
    and the underlying message.
    It is not the colour of your hair, but your attitude and confidence that makes you attractive and charming.I am sure your silver hair with their soft glow would continue to bring you compliments as your coloured hair used to.
    Covid times have taught us a lot of things.
    Looking forward to more articles from you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Smita ji your writing is interesting. It deals with problems which are bothering us on and off. I feel Grey hair has never been a problem for men. But it’s always been an on going issue with our gender. But it’s great to see that this salt and pepper look is now becoming common and also becoming a fashionable trend. Truly one of the few positive things happening out of corona. Cheers on your new look! 😍

    Liked by 1 person

  3. To color or not to colour…..
    Well articulated write up by Smita…. with love, style and emotional touch…..
    Corona has taught us so many things … specially to female brigade… how to go without making eyebrows, facials & so many other things….. specially to be in peace with ourselves….
    Growing with grey is also a graceful fashion. But even then for colouring hair, one may have different opinions….. it depends on personal traits, choice or thought process…. for me I like colouring my hair… my lovey dovey husband does not….

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Such intense issues dealt with such humour. This article will make many aging ladies feel at ease.You have a wonderful husband.
    “Salon” the very thought so comforting and relaxing. For me, less to do with beauty and more to do with soft, smooth massages relaxing my tensed nerves and muscles. How much one needs them at the time of menopause. Oh! I miss them. When will our good old days come back.
    Keep pampering yourself and keep loving yourself because each individual is different and precious.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. very interesting Mrs Chandra. We all can relate to this. Actually it’s a human tendency which gives very much importance to appearances and it’s nothing wrong in this..Even grey hair also looks very beautiful and graceful.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Such intense issues dealt with such humour. You have a wonderful husband.This article will make many aging ladies feel at ease.
    “Salon” the very thought so comforting and relaxing. For me, less to do with beauty and more to do with soft, smooth massages relaxing my tensed nerves and muscles. How much one needs them at the time of menopause. Oh! I miss them. When will our good old days come back.
    Keep pampering yourself and keep loving yourself because each individual is different and precious.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Wonderfully penned. So true. Those grey hairs are the symbol of dignity..the earnings of life and wisdom..every age has its own beauty..we must be prepared to accept it.The moto…Darling take me as I am😍😍

    Liked by 1 person

  8. This was a very beautiful read💓 Your writing has the unique quality of binding one’s attention , an effortless flow in the narrative and we just want to keep reading till the end!

    This has a beautiful lesson of love and acceptance of oneself.. I personally feel we create high (sometimes unrealistic)standards in minds that we continuously pitt our real selves against. Its a journey everyone has to take 🙏🏻⭐️

    Also, you and your daughter indeed look like sisters 🥰

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Smita ma’am, I felt that this lockdown has made people look through themselves and grow internally. Realise the truth and grow wiser.Beautiful article regarding physical appearance ma’am.Beauty is never lost its permanent, if lost then it’s not beautiful.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Good write up.Black, grey, salt & pepper or even silvery white can mean the elegance of age or show of style or even romantic choice of fashion as well. One can sport his or her liking but must carry it as natural part of personality.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Spot on once again Smita
    Corona has given us an opportunity to see ourselves in black and white.
    And colur is how we feel about what we really are.
    Well written
    Looking Great!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Very well written story. You touch those points that are ignored by most people. Acceptance of oneself is the key. Being a Male, I do not feel shy or awkward even with unshaven look or long hair or grey beard, and able to venture out easily, just because I accept myself as it is. Just like that for the other gender as well, this holds good. Ladies have to be confident, bold enough to accept as they are gracefully. Grey hair is not a matter of hiding and shying away, it is a sign of maturity and grace and experience. As said in hindi ye bal waise hi nahi dhoop me pake. Great article. keep it up. Will wait for more.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. We all are ageing , and it’s not a crime. It’s fine to have grey hair or wrinkles. We should love our self in all the faces of life . Corona lockdown has made us all come back to our natural/ original selves.
    It’s great to except our self like the way we are. Much love

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Worth reading.. !!
    Ageing is the blessing of god, we must appreciate it. It’s also said, ” Wrinkles means you Laughed, Grey hairs means you Cared, and Scars means you Lived”.
    Stay blessed..!!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. M in love with ur writing skills… specially the topics u choose to shed light on…these issues we deal with on daily basis…and you had portrayed it so simply n made us realised that age is just a no n every one will age… there’s no shame in ageing n grey hair are sign of experience n wisdom…

    Keep writing n inspiring us
    More power to you

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Perfectly written!❤️ Our thoughts of what beauty is versus real are bound to change its colour over the period of time, and embracing it the way it is makes you beautiful inside out and lockdown has played a role to make us all realise this…
    Much love😊

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Wowwwwwwwww…..

    You have touched the nerve sensitive to most of the girls of our age segment. The reading provides both relief and confidence.

    And yes, you look killer in all colors and shades – black, burgundy, brown or the latest Salt and pepper grey.

    Really very well articulated blog…

    Loved it….

    Liked by 2 people

  18. It’s an interesting read subject which everyone of us go through in some or the other way and have such impacts on our daily lives that we laugh it out at times . It’s really nice reading about them and correlating it with one’s own lives which finally leaves a smile at the end. I must acknowledge that both of you are really looking amazing in the new salt and pepper look 👌👌👏👏🍻🍻😊😊💐💐

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Hey Smita !!! Very well written ,liked it and related closely with it .. hats off to you for getting that confidence to carry yourself so gracefully without that ritual …still most of us are unable to do it ,at least me…our self image of staying young is so very strong … loved reading it and enjoyed the subtle humour !!! Congratulations !!!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. So beautifully penned.. You are an inspiration to many of us.. You look so graceful.
    This lockdown has brought a tremendous changes in our life styles. The beauty of life lies in accepting the way we are and moving forward with a smile always. Waiting for more…. Keep Writing.. Fond Regards

    Liked by 1 person

  21. The article felt it was written about me, for me. Truly such a serious issue dealt with in such a humorous manner. Excellent piece of writing Smita and it seems to flow effortlessly. For many of us COVID has changed our outlook and look 🤪🤪

    Liked by 1 person

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